No NHS today, so just some thoughts about people's reaction to cancer..........
As you may have gathered, the fact that I have cancer is not exactly a secret. If it was, I would hardly be writing about it on the internet for anyone and everyone to read (well, the select few of you who have found your way here). That being said, I have not exactly been running into the street shouting about it either!
As people find out, or I tell them, some of the reactions are very interesting. People who know me well ask how I am feeling about it and put up with me as normal; a couple are interested in the detail of my slow progression through the NHS (as you will have noticed over the last few weeks, I can bore for England on that one!), lots offer support if I need it or do something they know will make me feel good. But (I was taight never to start a sentence with "but", been waiting years for the chance), there is a fourth group who are fascinating: it seems to induce a kind of benign paralysis witha whole load of assumptions.
Regardless of the very public campaigns like Race for Life (breast), Movember (prostate), Tie Day (bowel) and some high profile support from people like the Prince of Wales (a friend has a very entertaining story about him, hand shaking and alcoholic fortification), cancer still remains a taboo subject which scares the pants off people. When confronted with it, they have no idea how to react either to the word or the person who has it. If I had broken a leg, or had appendicitis, I suspect they would have no problem, but cancer????
The only explanation I can offer is about immediacy. If something scares you, but is remote, you can park it in the "too difficult" corner of your brain. It sits there, you know it is there, but you do not need to bring it out and look at it. As soon as someone you know says they have cancer, up pop all the repressed fears................... This seems to give rise to a number of odd, but understandable reactions: become protective ("should you be carrying those chairs?"), repeated enquiries about your health (I have no symptoms!) or subtle distancing, only talking to my partner (how is he?) as if I might be contageous. Oddly, exactly the same way that people often act towards people with disabilities..........................something I have been battling for years.
Phil - osophy done.
Two lighter notes:
Booked an appointment for the tattoo! Monday the 27th
The most amazing band that I saw on tv last night. I had never heard of them before and cannot think why not. Here is one of the songs they performed:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZXMzQNjBSwk
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